Today I sit in a waiting room alone with piece in my heart knowing you are in control. As they announce “Mr. Jenkins your wife has begun her surgery” my heart drops into my stomach. The feeling of being alone is a very painful feeling for me, yet over the last 2 years it has been a more and more commonly felt feeling. I know that without pain there will be no growth, so I stand on my faith. Learning how to be alone and be in a healthy place is my new journey, there is no escape what’s inside our minds or what our heart feels. Right now I have a great teacher and a lesson that I am below average at. Music and art were my escapes, I’m finding that I can no longer draw from pain and music is no longer soothing to my soul. I have one choice, stand tall and face my heavenly teacher or turn my back on him and run back into the dark. The feelings of empowerment are overwhelming and at times a bit alien to the way my mind meet my emotions, so I stand, but not tall yet. The love of our friends and family is the life blood that is teaching me to stand, all that is yet is reach out my hand and take yours. Thank you for your time and in your time I will be the man you have planned for me to be.