Learning To Love


 

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“Love one another but make not a bond of love. Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls”. – Khalil Gibran

Everything I have done in my life I have always done the hard way, I think that goes for most of us though. The lessons we learn are usually hard, or we wouldn’t learn from them. There are two lessons I have learned about love, and I’m sure the learning has only just begun.

The first is not to rely on another person; they are human too and to hold someone accountable for being more than they are capable is far too much pressure. The best relationship is one in which the love you have for each other exceeds the need you have for each other.

The other is learning to be ok with who I am and if I can’t be happy alone I am putting too much pressure on someone else and believing they will always be there.

I have failed at both of these many times and until recently have never truly been ok with myself or being alone. I told myself over and over I’m not sure I could do something and in most cases proved myself right by not trying hard enough. It was a vicious cycle of I’m right and always being right.

If you question whether or not you could be doing this, ask yourself these three questions.

·         What would you do if he/she was gone?

·         How do you feel when they leave for an extended period of time?

·         Are you allowing or depending on them for your happiness? (Are you in a bad mood when they are or happy when they are happy)

Through my life there are some lessons that changed my life, some negatively and some positively. Learning about who I am and begin completely honest with myself was one of the best life lessons. I have learned to be ok alone, that I can do “it” and that no one is responsible for my happiness.

I feel like I have grown more in the last 2 years than the 33 years

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