In My Emotions Again 


I have a way of talking too much over thinking and overreacting quite often, so I hear. Well maybe their right.

Maybe I need to do more listening and less talking.

 “A point of view can be a dangerous luxury when substituted for insight and understanding”. – Marshall McLuhan

How do we understand when we haven’t experienced something?

It would be like someone without children trying to give advice about how to raise children, it just has no power and I struggle to even hear them.

My point of view is at times narrow and subject to what I want to see as opposed to what reality is. I have things in my life that I just don’t want to change and I’m not willing to compromise on. I’m not sure if it’s right or justified but it speaks to my heart so I feel it’s correct for me to believe in how I feel.

When you are used to feeling a certain way, reacting a specific way to someone and handling things in a way that hurts less it can become uncomfortable to re-train what you know and how you react.

I had no intention on writing tonight, it was supposed to be a relaxing night away from everyone, yet I find myself thinking about why I am alone right now. Sitting here in my chair with Pandora in the background, I feel a little freedom and at the same time I sacrificed a night to spend with people I love to be around.

Maybe the “extrovert” I thought I am is not the case. I really desire to be labeled as something.. But why?

I want to fit into a category of some kind and yet I don’t.

I have never agreed with the “manly life”. Sure I’m male, but I don’t like sports, I prefer art, I don’t like hunting, I prefer hugging, I don’t like “manly” things, I prefer long conversations and touch. I just don’t fit the stereotypical “man” and that bothers me. It’s like calling an overweight person fat, or a skinny person too thin.

So my point of view has always been more of a feeling than my opinion and I have often been used by others because of my selflessness.

I’m trying to understand more and be open to the fact that I may be wrong at times, and now I have someone I can trust to provide logical and rational input regarding my life, I need to listen.

I’m learning that my point of view truly doesn’t mean as much as I believe it does and maybe for a change in should listen instead of talk.

So when I hear “less words” I know that means listen and when someone opens up to me I should hear what they say not try to fix anything.

Life is so mysterious and at times hard to understand.

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